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7 Realities of Living on Our Own
November 26, 2018

Freedom. What a wonderful word. So wonderful that it leaves a sweet taste in the mouth even when just mentioned in passing.

 When we were kids, we were often told what to do, what to wear, what to eat, and even how to arrange our things. Now that we’re grown-ups, we can finally enjoy the independent life, with no one to breathe down our backs. Truly a wonderful thought, until realization kicks in that reality always hits harder than expectations.

There are just some realities that don’t measure up to imagination. The following examples should not be taken as deterrents, but rather valuable lessons we should all learn when we decide to become independent.

             1) Expectation: Freedom from our strict and/or doting parents.

We’ve all probably been there before. We all think that we can handle the world all on our own; that we can go through any challenge and come out victorious, without ever needing the help of anybody else, let alone mom and dad. This type of freedom sounds tempting for us Pinoys who have experienced the strict and traditional upbringing of our parents. Surely, many of us have dreamt of being free from their searing gazes, building our own identities in the world, creating our own schedules, and enjoying life without anyone else telling us what to do.

Reality: We end up forgetting our responsibilities, getting lost in the process of prioritizing. Like being late for work because we no longer have anyone waking us up in the morning. Our parents have been our primary guardians since we were young, hence, they know each and every task and process in our lives. This isn’t just about doing the laundry or budgeting monthly groceries, this is also about knowing how to do things in order and on time. Living on our own means leaving our lifelong guides for the things we often took for granted.

Lesson: However, this teaches us to be responsible. It teaches us to set alarms, plan ahead and keep to deadlines, skills we’ll definitely need to succeed in the future.

             2) Expectation: We are a master chef in our own right. Merely peeking at cook books enable us to come up with the most delicious delicacies ever known to man.

Yup, we’re confident that a few YouTube and Facebook videos can turn us into the next kitchen god. With just those, we can master the art of preparing dishes ala Gordon Ramsay and impress whomever we want to invite to dinner.

Reality: Cooking is not as easy as it looks. If one is an inexperienced cook, one should also hope that their friends have strong stomachs, as delicious dishes aren’t made just by watching recipes online. Even culinary majors usually take things at a slow pace. Hence, dinner invitations should be held off until one has already mastered some recipes, or is willing to settle for deliveries until then.

Lesson: Learning to cook takes time, practice cooking dishes that use less complicated techniques before moving on to more ambitious projects. Prepare your ingredients before the actual cooking process. Avoid rushing things.

             3) Expectation: We have all the time in the world.

We are the masters of our time, no curfew, no rules, and no deadlines to worry about.

Reality: Well, this is entirely false. Remember, living alone entails that we must provide for ourselves, hence, we must pay for our own rent and monthly supplies. This means that we’ll have to work hard for every penny we need, resulting in less time for our hobbies and supposed “endless barrels of fun.”

Lesson: Time management is key. Our parents and teachers have repeatedly taught us the value of time. As long as we keep that in mind and manage our time well we should be able to cope.

             4) Expectation: We can now buy whatever we want, unmonitored. 

No parent is there to stop us from purchasing whatever item that catches our eye. No one to scold us for buying an expensive cellphone or computer. No one there to stop us from eating at expensive restaurants, attending concerts on a regular basis, or going on a luxury cruise every once in a while.

Reality: Remember when we said something about working hard for our needs? Well, the same rule applies here. Unless we’re wealthy, we’d likely only have a little bit of spending money after paying off our monthly expenditures. Where would we get the money for those “wants”?

Don’t get us wrong, those “items” can still be attained with enough hard work and determination, but that would require us to save for a certain period of time, in order to keep to our monthly budget.

Lesson: We should try to set aside a small amount every time we budget. The thing is, those small amounts can accumulate to hundreds, even thousands by the end of the year, allowing us to treat ourselves later on.

             5) Expectation: We’ll finally have enough time to be with our friends.

Unlike our school days, no one is here to stop us from attending a friend’s birthday party or mixer. No one is here to implement any curfews and strict policies about coming home late.

Reality: It’s true, we’ll be free to attend any gathering this time around without asking anyone else’s permission. However, this would also depend on our friends’ schedules. Will they even find the time to organize a gathering or party at all? Remember, right after graduation, we’re all going to be focusing on building our careers, hence, less hangout time and more office time. Overtimes are a near sure thing, and some might even have weekend work schedules. After all, not everyone is going to find a 9-5 job. In short, good luck organizing any group activities.

Lesson: Remember, C&U. C stands for “coordinate.” Be sure to contact the group every once in a while to find out their days off. If they’re not available then “understand” that career isn’t different from college. Everyone’s focused on making it to the big leagues, in building a fruitful career. Also, some gatherings and reunions are best left unplanned, as sudden meet-ups are even more meaningful than those which were planned ahead.

             6) Expectation: We’ll be in charge of our own space from now on.

No nagging parents to tell us to pick up our socks. No one to force us to wash the dishes. We’ll have all the time in the world to handle those trivial chores. After all, it’s just cleaning up after ourselves. How hard can it be?

Reality: It’s harder than it seems. Take laundry, for example. What temperature does the water have to be? How much laundry powder should we put in? How do we set the machine? Where will we dry your clothes? How will we iron our formal wear? Is that blazer dry-clean only?

Lesson: Don’t be embarrassed to ask for advice. Make sure you learn everything you need to learn before leaving home. Our parents can provide valuable tips in keeping our place clean, and may even offer to literally lend a hand during our condo spring cleaning.

             7) Expectation: Being free and independent means that we’ll be able to explore the outside world more, so much that we’ll have less interest in coming home.

We’d be able to meet new people, discover new places, indulge in food that we haven’t tasted before…and the list goes on.

Reality: Because of the stress from work, we’ll definitely want to go home after every shift. The hassle of traffic and deadlines will also tire us out, hence, we’ll always feel the need to relax and unwind in our own private space.

Lesson: There is nothing wrong about exploring the world and experiencing what it has to offer, but we must also remember to take care of ourselves. Rest whenever necessary. Sleep is a good friend that we shouldn’t ignore, likewise, is a good book, a soft couch, and the relaxing aroma of coffee.

Having learned out lessons, we are ready to take the next step in our lives and venture forth on our own. Look no further than the best and most trusted when it comes to quality condos: Torre Lorenzo. Contact us via 86-TORRE (86773) or visit our website at https://www.torrelorenzo.com for more information.

Photo credit: https://unsplash.com/photos/52AAiXWoVi0

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